Change is Part of Life. So Why Do We Resist?

We could argue that human nature is quite predictable when it comes to change. Truth is we like it when our lives stay pretty much the same, familiar and stable. The more we are set in our predictable ways, the more we resist change. And this resistance can be very annoying and even frustrating when one of our desire is to grow and succeed in our personal and work life.

Don’t you find it ironic that we can find ourselves arguing against change when everything around us changes every second of every day, including our bodies? Every day, millions of new cells form within us.  Look at the speed babies grow. From the time they are born to around the age of 5-6, it’s a period when the most change occurs in their bodies in their life time.

Every day is a challenge for us to renew or reinvent ourselves whether it is in our work, our families, our communities and even our bodies. While the human spirit might try to fight off change, we still need to ask ourselves “How can I be more accepting of change?”

We often resist change when we feel threaten as to who we are and our way of life. The threat may or may not be real and it doesn’t matter.  As long as you perceive there is a threat, you will be more guarded and resist doing anything different.

When you become aware of your resistance, taking the time to reflect on why you feel threaten, and realize that it’s normal to feel like this, only then can you start to make some changes, changes that will benefit you and those around you.

See resistance as a diagnostic tool. This will be the first step in realizing something isn’t right between your inner and outer world. For this perspective, you can see that resistance isn’t all bad. It’s a sign that you need to examine what’s going on in your life and do some evaluating.

Change often makes us feel insecure and uncertain, but without the push to take a risk and make a change, you will never realize what is possible for you. When my husband and I decided to leave our home country to move with our three teenagers to the United States, there was some resistance from everyone. This meant we would be talking another language on a daily basis, find new friends, work with different people, look for new grocery stores, new activities and the list goes on.  Had we not taken the risk and let ourselves feel uncomfortable, we would not have known the blessing and gifts we received from our new home and life.

Maybe it’s not the fear of taking a risk that holds you back but the fear of making a mistake, getting life wrong, of failing or finding yourself heading in the wrong direction.

Let me tell you that we all feel some hesitancy towards embracing a new identity or accepting a new challenge, especially if there is uncertainty as to whether you will survive the change or be successful. After all, no one wants to fail.

Resisting change is like resisting the air we breathe. Like the air, change is necessary, and whatever stress change causes in your life, just remember that it’s temporary. This too shall pass and you will find it easier to accept as part of your life.

What are some of the challenges around change do you face in your relationship or family? What’s holding you back from moving forward?  Share with me and I’ll answer you back. Promise.

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